up later. Let's go.
Someone has to find the toilet seat.
- Buck found it on the sun porch.
- Sun porch?
- It makes you wonder.
- No excuses.
- What are you doing?
- I don't know.
- Stop it.
- The kids are at the lake.
- Chet, what are you doing?
- Nothing.
Honey, no.
We got the house to ourselves. Hello!
Oh, no, what happened? I'm sorry.
I just don't feel like this.
I'm tired, I'm stinky.
- Come on.
- What are you doing?
- We got the house by ourselves.
- What about the kids?
- They're down the lake.
- Don't!
- Let's go to the bedroom.
- Why?
That's the great thing
about being in the woods.
- What are you feeding me now?
- Come on.
You can run around naked
and you won't run into anybody.
- Is that right?
- Yes.
Really?
Do you think it's possible
that we could play fashion parade?
- I don't want to play.
- Why?
- You get to wear the good outfits.
- I'll let you wear them.
- You will?
- You will be Shelana.
- Shelana, the oak tree woman.
- I love being the oak tree woman!
- Temptress of the woods.
- Yes!
And I will be Burt. A guy named Burt.
I love it when you're Burt.
You're always so manly.
Or I could be Smokey's cousin Horny.
- He has endurance too.
- Yes, he does.
Anybody home?
Shelana the woods temptress
with Horny the bear, Smokey's cousin?
OK. OK.
- Turn that off.
- Oh, yeah! No, Chester, you said it.
Do it on the floor!
Beautiful style. That's all right.
Role-playing helps in a marriage
after a while.
Turn the damn thing off.
That was quite a surprise.
You got me.
And the whole week you'll be here.
Ha-ha, OK!
Oh, wow. Just something.
Anyway, you're an intelligent man.
Thank you.
- Make a good living.
- Not bad.
- Got a good life.
- Pretty good.
- Answer me this.
- Sure.
Why would you want to come
to a no-man's-land like this
and live like a barbarian for a week?
- You wouldn't understand.
- Try me.
I have great memories of this country.
I used to come here with my dad
and I want the boys to have
the same memories.
Look around you, Roman, for God's
sakes, this is beautiful country.
Take a good look.
I'll tell you what I see,
if you want to know.
Yeah, I'm curious.
The underdeveloped resources
of Minnesota, Wisconsin and Michigan,
a consortium exploiting over
a billion dollars in forest products.
I see a paper mill
and a mining operation,
a green belt between lakeside condos
and a waste management facility
focusing on the newest rage in waste -
medical refuse.
Infected bandages, body parts,
IV tubing, syringes,
fluid, blood, radioactive waste -
all contained,
sunken in the lake
and sealed for centuries.
I ask you, what do you see?
I just see...
see trees.
No one ever accused you
of having a grand vision.
While the ambitious scramble
for wealth and power,
the Chets of the world can lay back
and casually stroll along life's path.
- That's a compliment.
- Oh, thanks.
The rest of us will probably die
of strokes long before you!
I hope so. Wouldn't that be great?
To see a bunch of people drop
that you hate. That'd be something else.
My goodness! My goodness me.
I'm going to walk down life's path
right now.
Get the barbecue going, hot dogs...
Wait a minute. No way.
Wait a hot shit minute.
Rule one - no relative of mine
is eating hot dogs
as long as he's sharing my cabin. Katie!
Do you sense the presence
of an alien life form?
Now you mention it, I do sense
something kind of strange.
Oh, sh...
Did I tell you
about the futures market?
- Probably.
- We got a Deutschmarks contract,
sat on it a week, sold it,
took in a 300% profit.
Well, easy money
is money easily lost.
I can't believe how old-fashioned
your thinking is.
- 300% profit, huh?
- Sometimes 200% or 100%.
Take the good with the bad.
Yeah. Still, that's pretty good.
Point of the matter is,
you should have your piece too.
Whoa! Hot!
- How are those tails?
- They're 28 bucks a pop.
28? Oh, my God. Chet and I haven't
had